an english sunrise

never have i ever been so joyous
than in this moment
for fear of the bad things that might destroy us
perceived everything as an omen

oh man
a night
what a night
it had been
a celebration of a birthday
i lost myself in the crevices between hot bodies
and pulsating lights
it was heroin
the feeling was ethereal
but i was in this dimension
losing my grip on reality
the club was surely purgatory
a home for lonely souls
with dirty soles
hoping to leave purgatory
and reach climactic heaven
with another empty eyed shell

where had my friends gone?
had they left the club without me?
surely.
but i found them.
on that dance floor, i lost myself.
hopefully, someone returned my soul to the lost and found.

on the bus ride home, we all talked and celebrated.
in and out of consciousness, i was beyond tired.
but as soon as we arrived on Waterloo Bridge near our apartment,
i gained a shot of energy noticing the beginning of dawn.
the twilight zone was leaving.
my friends had left me, for it was nearing 6 AM.
but in that moment, i was alone.
i reached nirvana.
such peace, made me cry in the moment.
i had never been so happy before,
on the opposite side of the rail,
hanging over the water,
ready to delve into the Thames.
but jump i did not,
i watched the sun climb over the london skyline
and fell in love with the world
london
myself.
the utter bliss
was
comforting.
my back was filled with knots
but the morning sun
untied.
the english sunrise.

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